Enjolras (
pro_patria_mortuus) wrote2015-04-30 11:43 pm
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Yesterday was a long and exceedingly strange day.
But it ended with reunion, and one more friend here, long-lost, and with all the joy and celebration that accompanies that. Even the next morning, the sunlight seems brighter for the memory.
But it ended with reunion, and one more friend here, long-lost, and with all the joy and celebration that accompanies that. Even the next morning, the sunlight seems brighter for the memory.
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"I think it was a real Paris, not a dream," he says. "As I understand it, the Labyrinth takes us to places that exist, albeit in other worlds, other universes. That Paris is as true as ours." Combeferre has no words for the joy and the pain of that--something so wondrous, so real, and so unattainable for them. But still real, still true.
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But this was real. A real Paris, an entire Earth, where this came to pass; where a Jean-Sébastien Enjolras, a Jean-Luc Combeferre, a Bahorel and a Joly and a Feuilly and a Jean Prouvaire and all the rest of them lived to see the Republic dawn. They couldn't bring it about, not in Enjolras's world and not in Combeferre's, no matter how much he and Bossuet strove to change their little corner of history. But in some world, the citizens of France know that bright triumph and concord as simple fact, achieved, unassailable.
A few tears have slid down his cheeks, twin glittering trails, cool against the warmth of the morning sunlight. His shoulders have sagged, very slightly, in a rare moment of rest.
"Good," is all he says, softly. His heart is full.
"Good."
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Enjolras thinks, eventually, to bend long enough to set his mug of coffee on the ground. He'll retrieve it later.
"How much of it did you see? Was it only that corner?"
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He wonders, suddenly, what it would have been like to encounter his older self in this world. "We had no chance to see more," he says. "We were whisked back to Milliways shortly after arriving at the Vivent les peuples wall."
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"Still."
Still, what a miraculous gift.
Everything else he could say feels like an empty pleasantry, understated to pointlessness: Still, you saw it, or it's good she was there to tell you of it, or something else to wrap needless words around the heart of this bittersweet joy that overwhelms him. He presses Combeferre's hand once more, trusting -- knowing -- that Combeferre will know what's in his heart. All of them would share the same thoughts in the face of this.
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Combeferre might have met that Enjolras, too, an Enjolras who had been a public servant for decades, whose love for France had been allowed to burn steadily for years. He looks down, unable to stop his eyes going blurry.
"Yes." Still, he had the privilege of knowing this other Enjolras existed. Still, he knew it was all real.
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Once, Enjolras quietly hated Milliways. No longer. Now he has friends here; now, there are gifts like this, a visit to another Paris, and friends to share that joy with beyond death.
"Have you told the others?"
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"No, I didn't have the chance. Last night--the Bar was busy, and we all had so much to discuss." He smiles. "I can't wait to tell them."
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"Let's."
He rises.
(Sooner or later he'll remember his abandoned mug of coffee, but probably not until it's stone cold.)
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He pulls a waistcoat at random from the closet. A somber gray, like every other one he has. He shrugs it on. "Feuilly might be awake." Unlike some of their other friends, Combeferre does not need to add.
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Enjolras had chosen black trousers when he rose, in the unthinking habit of months -- perhaps longer, in the indefinable way of time's passage at Milliways. It's hard to say, here where a week can pass in a night and the calendar seems to advance by steps and skips. But he pauses, now, and studies the contents of the drawer, and reaches instead for a pair of pale gray trousers.
He's never worn these. Nor the blue waistcoat and coat that follow after.
But Prouvaire is here now, the last of their number. Not the last of the Amis de l'ABC, nor the last man Enjolras called friend, but now the inner circle of their dearest friends is complete, all eight lieutenants and Grantaire; all dead on the rue de la Chanvrerie, and all here. It seems a worthy enough day to choose.
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But he couldn't fail to notice Enjolras's regular mourning attire. It was a daily tribute to their friends, and a moving expression of Enjolras's grief for them. To see Enjolras reach for light, bright colors--
Combeferre smiles, pulling on his coat, and says nothing. They'd never discussed Enjolras's mourning--they'd never needed to--and there's no need to discuss the end of it now. Enjolras's frame of mind is plain to see. Combeferre, still smiling, suspects his own is equally so.